Don't Let the Man in your Life Hang your Mirrors if you are a Short-Arse

Witty aren't I?

"This house is full of women" Ekky sometimes complained when were still living together in Fazakerley.  Well yes, he did have a wife and three daughters.  Mind you, he did possibly have a point:  the cats and the dog were girls and as I once him mutter morosely into the fish tank as he cleaned it, "Even the bloody fish are female".

Although he taught the three us rudimentary car mechanics and basic painting & decorating skills he did still like pretend he was the alpha male in the household and performed most of the DIY tasks like hanging curtain rails or shelves.  Us Phenna females are not the tallest  in the world, not one of us is over five foot two (Middle Sis claims to be the tallest but she is telling a whopper) and Ekky wasn't massive but he was a lot taller than we were.  He hung all the mirrors in the house according to his height - as long as he could see sufficiently while using his curling tongs he was happy.  The rest of us had to develop some contortionist skills just to brush your teeth.

If you wanted to use the mirror in the downstairs bog you had to climb on the toilet seat and lean sideways across the sink.  If you were doing your make up you had to hope it was symmetrical because you could only see half your face and you just hoped you didn't look like Sunnie Mann.

The mirror in the bathroom only displayed the top of your head.  When applying your red "Glints" the only way to get a good view was go to a bedroom, pick up a chair, drag it back to the bathroom and then stand on the bloody thing.

But the best one was the one in the hall.  Fairly tall, it was the best mirror to check you had tucked your shirt in properly and you had actually remembered to put your skirt on.  However, it was hung about five foot up the wall so the only way to get a glimpse of your latest Kumar's number was to jump up and down.  One solution would have been to stand on the bottom tread of the stairs giving yourself a bit of extra height.  But no, the mirror was hung about a foot and a half to the left of the foot of the stairs so all you could see was a bit of your feet.

I don't think it ever occurred to Ekky why the four of us went through a pogo-ing ritual in the hall several times a day.  Perhaps he thought it was what women do - leap up and down before putting their coat on and going out the door.  In return we never asked him why he sometimes polyurethaned potatoes.