I'm a Common Tart

The Legs O'Man on the corner of Lime Street.
Allegedly it was full of "tarts"

Cariad and I are off to The St Tropez of the North this week to visit Mother.  There are some rules I have to adhere to so as not to qualify as being "common" or a "tart" while visiting.  Listed below here are some actions I must definitely avoid, namely:

Going to the bookies and putting a line on.

Buy a pie and eat it in the street.

Refer to the utility room as "the wash-house".

Say "fuckshitwankbollocks" if I bang my head.

Drink rum & black.

Go beyond the front door still wearing slippers.

Wear an ankle chain.

Buy some orange lilies*

Order a pint instead of a glass.

Say "youse" instead of "all of you".

Go in the "Legs O'Man" - yes, I know it's been demolished but it still qualifies as somewhere only "tarts" go.

 
*This actually comes under the classification of being a "Prod" but is equally taboo